Oh goodness me! Day 1 of the New Year is upon us and I have ended up on the couch, watching Bridget Jones’s Diary and I just so happen to be wearing a much larger pair of underpants than Miss Jones.
I’m horrified. I’m distraught. And I have a massive wedgie.
This is me in all my glory. This is who I am. I am this person.
I don’t know why I bought such a large pair of underpants. (Well obviously they were on sale.)
I think they’re meant to keep your tummy looking nicer under a dress but really I just walk around feeling like everyone can see my wedgie through my dress and thus again ruining any chance of ever having the upper hand in the public strutting self esteem championships.
I am dismayed. My son saw me in them and said that they look like bathers but bigger. Not. Helping. Darling.
But in keeping with me and who I am and what I do I will not throw out the offending pair of knickers but rather put them away with my other delicates until in about 5 weeks I wear a dress that requires some sucking in and I’ll forget about today, about Bridget Jones and about my instant feeling of distress as soon as I walk out the door in the large purple panties and pull them on again.
There is a metaphor here. This is a parable. There is a lesson for all. Can’t for the life of me think of what it might be.
I think it might be that we don’t change. That we hold onto things that we don’t need and that don’t suit us. That we go with what we know… no matter how uncomfortable or unflattering it may be.
And that now that I am the same age as Bridget Jones I finally understand the need for such a pair of underwear.