An open letter to the sleep fairy…

Dear Sleep Fairy,

“I’m over here” shouts the voice in my head while doing cart wheels and waving Pom-poms wildly while wearing a blue sequined crop top and small white hot pants.

(In real life my head is wearing a sleeping mask with a picture of the Eiffel Tower on it and I have ear plugs in.)

“Shut the hell up” says my brain. “She’s trying to get to sleep.”

“Close your eyes really tightly and try to make it all go black” says the voice back to the brain.

“What if that is actually just a little bit like dying and I don’t wake up” says a random voice that has obviously been disproven every time yet still seems to be considered a reliable source of information by some.

“All of you please just be really quiet and try to think of nothing” says the brain.

“Oooooooh nothing! I can do that. Nothing and unicorns. Nothing and rainbows. Nothing and ….”

“What was that noise?”

“How long until payday?”

“Do I really have an intolerance to marshmallows? Does that make me soft?”

“What time does she have to get up?”

“What time is it now?”

“In 3 hours?”

“That’s not enough”

“Why is she crying?”

“She’s just tired”

“Oh… She should try and get some sleep”

So in closing…

I’m on some new medication that lists insomnia as a possible side effect. And while I would obviously prefer that to liver disease which is also mentioned as a possible side effect I’m actually a little bit over this and would like to sleep now.

Lots of love,

From Me (and my brain and the voices in my head who are not in the least bit tired).

*please feel free to correct my spelling and grammar in your own brain, mine is busy dancing to Beyonce*


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