So for the past few nights I’ve woken up at 3am. Just randomly.
There are no screaming children.
No loud noises outside.
No phone calls.
(Just the usual snoring husband.)
And yet here I am finding myself waking at 3am. Wide awake.
Splitting my peaceful dreaming and sleeping into 2 parts.
I remember clearly the dreams I had before and after 3am last night.
Before 3am I was dreaming about living in a caravan park and sleeping on a mattress on the floor that wasn’t big enough. (There may have been spiders in the bedding which had me alert but not alarmed.) In the dream everyone was awake and being loud in the middle of the night. Kicking footballs and partying.
In my dream after my 3am period of wakefulness I was being chased in a sexy detective way through caves. I looked great. (Hello! It was my dream so I’m hardly gonna look uggers am I?) I was wearing a large wide brimmed hat and a black one piece swimming costume. Kind of like a pasty pale Bond girl. (I think there was a pool. I hope there was a pool. It would be weird of me to being a swimsuit otherwise.)
I wonder if it will happen again tonight? Will I be awoken for no reason and lie in the dark and the cold longing for sleep to come and tuck me in tightly.
I think it’s making me tired. But I’m asleep by 8:30 most nights so maybe I’m getting too much sleep?
Last year when everything was going to hell in an express elevator I would often wake in the night and sob to myself as I worried about all the hard things that the next day would bring and the unrelenting responsibilities that would be thrust upon me from the moment I woke up.
Now I just lie awake hoping that I don’t start to think about needing to pee. Because as well all know once you think about needing to pee you will only feel better once you have gotten up and dealt with nature.
But anyway back to me. I am not scared about 3am.
I am however petrified that my children will wake up at 5:30am on the weekend and pull all their clothes out of their wardrobes in an elaborate game of dress ups… again!