Can you try and half fill this for me Love?

Today I had to have a blood test that I then discovered also asked for a urine test.

I’ve been tired and had a sore throat for a while so it’s always lovely to wake up, not eat anything or drink coffee, fight with the whole family, drop the kids off to school and then have a blood test at 9 am.

The blood test was going well. The man was quite chatty perhaps bordering on flirty.

Then in the same flirty talk he asked if I thought I might be able to provide a urine sample.

I said yes and he flirtatiously gave me a jar, a bag and 2 wipes and told me how to use them.

It felt a tad odd.

I personally am going to go out on a small limb and suggest that flirting and urine samples don’t mix.

Actually nothing should mix with the urine sample and you should make sure that the lid is on very tight and you should make sure you take a long time washing your hands.

Blood collecting of course can be seriously flirty in a “this will only hurt while it’s going in” vampirish way.

But urine collecting? Nope. Never.

Due to the nature of my brain it have spent far too much time today thinking of other jobs where flirting could be considered of poor taste.

Obviously an undertaker shouldn’t flirt with their clients.

Mainly because they can’t flirt back and the clients that are still alive are probably not in a receptive headspace.

Medical practitioners performing any procedures that involve the mentioning and or collecting of bowel movements.

Well that’s actually all I can think of right now.

Maybe you’ve got some more no-go flirting professions?

Me? Well I’m just rest up and milk my tiredness for all I can.

#passmethenetflix (and coffee in bed).

xx

Advertisements

Hey good looking!

Look I don’t want to alarm anyone but I seem to be at peak attractiveness at the moment.

I’ve been flirted with a lot. And for once I’m not starting it.

Last week it was the guy with the snake at work who said something suggestive as he placed the 3m long creature around my neck.

Wait. What? Did that make sense? The man who was in charge of the reptile incursion at my preschool flirted with me.

And the guy who delivered the packages. The big packages. Of paper and paste and sticky tape. He complimented me on my ability to sign the electronic pad in a very flirty way.

Today when the postman delivered my book I order I gave him my name and he said to me “oh I know who you are.” Again in a flirty way or maybe he just remembered me from last time.

On my way home I picked up a pizza and the man asked if my husband was away again and I said yes and he said that if he was my husband he wouldn’t travel so much.

I refrained from pointing out that he owns a pizza shop. A profession not known for lots of interstate and overseas business trips.

He then told me that he made my pizza extra special and he opened the box and showed me. And sure enough there was lots of cheese.

It’s hard being an attractive woman in your mid 30’s. People are naturally drawn to me, it’s tiring.

So maybe it’s time I turned down the pheromones or maybe wore little less dark eyeliner and Jessica Simpson perfume.

Maybe I shouldn’t wear that $8 dress I got from the local supermarket out in public.

Or maybe it’s all in my head and I’ve forgotten how to act around other humans.

Either way a little flattery and flirting can be good for the soul.

If only I know how to wolf whistle. xx

If looks could thrill…

Hello all,

I have another confession to make.

Tonight I used my extremely powerful sexy eyes for evil.

I was at my work Christmas party at an extremely loud restaurant where my colleagues and I had just enjoyed a yummy dinner.

I had the duck risotto. In case you were wondering.

Anyway we decided we wanted to order dessert so I said to the lady sitting next to me “watch as I use my
sexy eyes to attract the waiters attention”.

I then turned them up to 11.

Poor guy. Didn’t know what had hit him. He immediately came over, prompting much laughter and brought us the dessert menus.

Then he called me darling and by the time he was running across the room to hold the door open just for me and embraced me with a kiss my colleagues were in hysterics.

I must emphasise that this was a group of 7 ladies most of whom don’t get out much.

This poor strapping young man didn’t stand a chance against my sexy eyes.

Unfortunately though a little bit of sexy eye must have ricocheted off the waiter and got the bald guy with sunglasses on his head behind him because he wouldn’t stop staring and smiling at me either.

So either my blue paper hat from the Christmas bonbon makes me irresistible to men or I need to remember to tone down the sexy eyes in public.

But hey it’s nice to be noticed and fun to be fancied for a change.

x