In the 80’s and 90’s in Australia there was a long running quiz show called Sale of the Century. The hosts and cohosts were beloved. The prizes were of a reasonable standard and it finished at 7:30 which was my cue to start whinging about having to go to bed.
They usually asked short questions but at they also asked questions about famous people. Slowly revealing more facts until someone guessed who it was.
Which leads me to the question of…
Who am I?
No really? Who am I?
Who do you think I am? Or more importantly who do you see me as?
Am I the funny girl who says strange things?
Am I the girl who listens?
Am I your kids teacher?
Am I the person you like to have coffee with?
Am I the person who cooks, cleans and looks after your every need?
We save different sides of ourselves for different people don’t we?
Some people always get to see the brave face and some people get to see the raw version.
I try to be honest and if you give me enough time I will be but I’m not so good at the superficial stuff so I play the funny card.
I don’t get to be shy very often.
Usually only my own.
Does that make sense?
Pretending to be happy/funny/sane can be exhausting.
I’m not working at the moment so I’m a little bit lost as to who I am.
I’m a stay at home mum but my kids are at school so I’m really just a stay at home lady.
I’ve been volunteering at the kids school because I’m not good at being left alone in my own head for too long.
I know who I want you to think I am.
I want to be the person that is there for other people and is kind and offers to help but you can’t be that person all the time either.
You have to save your best self sometimes for the people who need it or the ones who deserve it or the people who see you as an even better version of yourself than you think you could ever be.
Sometimes you have to be tough and sometimes you’re allowed to be vulnerable and you get to care a little bit more.
So in answer to the unanswerable question on the quiz show “Who am I”?
I’m whoever you’ll let me be. xx